The whine modulator app

April 5, 2013 in An App for That, Featured Question of the Week, Question of the Week, Spotlight Answers by Cole Huffman

While critique is often helpful and needed, criticism resulting from myopic perspectives or misery seeking company is usually whiny and draining. Fred Craddock said there is no way to modulate the human voice to make a whine acceptable. I’d make an app for pastors that proves it.

Every time someone in the church complains about something petty, pull out your smartphone and press the “Whine Modulator.” The app is a voice recorder that plays back the complaint how I’m actually hearing it—L’enfant Terrible, Eeyore, Chalkboard Scratch, Junkyard Dawg, Fran Drescher, Gilbert Gottfried, Kim Jong Un. I expect to retire comfortably on the sales.

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